Helping your child when screen time is over

Your child needs your help transitioning from the immersive state of watching a show to the reality of here and now. Turning off a screen brings particularly intense emotions sometimes—even when limits are clear and timers are set. Here are some tips that can help.

Set a clear expectation in advance

Before their screen time begins, explain to your child how long they will have before it’s over. Set a visual timer and use a firm but caring approach so it’s clear that the time limit is not up for negotiation: “You can watch one episode and then we’ll turn off the screen and play outside.”

Talk about how they might feel when screen time ends

Even for adults, ending fun activities can sometimes be hard. Try asking your toddler, “How did you feel the last time you watched your show and it had to end?” Helping your child predict strong emotions makes it easier for them to handle big feelings when they do come up.

Reconnect when screen time is almost over

“About five minutes before you’re going to switch something off, rather than reminding your child that you’re going to switch it off, join them…Bring your child a drink or maybe a little snack, something that brings their body back to the here and now.”

Dr. Martha Collado on The Lovevery Podcast

To help your child bridge the gap between the digital world and the real world, experts recommend engaging with them for the last few minutes or so. Ask them a question about what’s happening on the screen and see if they answer: “What’s that character’s name?” Bring your child a drink of water or a snack, watch the end of their show together. Your child loves when you show interest in things in their world. Asking questions and showing interest can help them switch gears from engaging with screen time to engaging with you.

Acknowledge their feelings and maintain the limit

If your child pushes back when screen time is over, recognize and validate their feelings while being confident in the limit you set: “It’s so hard when your show is over. I know you want to keep watching, but it’s time to turn it off.” Staying calm—even when your child is upset—provides them with a model for how to regulate their own feelings.

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More expert advice

Make the most of screen time with high-quality children’s shows
Choose high-quality programming and watch with your child to help them understand what they see. Very young children are not yet able to translate what they perceive on a two-dimensional screen into the physical world. Limit screen time to no more than an hour a day and turn off devices an hour or more before bedtime.

The Lovevery Podcast
In this episode of our podcast “My New Life” CEO Jessica Rolph talks with Dr. Martha Collado about simple ways to bring more harmony to the conclusion of screen time. 

Preventing screen-time meltdowns – My New Life

Screens are hard to avoid in today's world, and when our children do have access, turning them off can bring on some big emotions! Have you ever wondered why they have these oversized reactions? Or how to avoid them?   My New Life host Jessica Rolph is joined by  Dr. Martha Deiros Collado, a psychologist specializing in family therapy who has her own podcast called Talking Sense, and an Instagram presence at @dr.martha.psychologist. Listen to today's episode for simple tips to bring more harmony to the conclusion of screen time.    Highlights: [1:03] Does Dr. Martha use screens with her three-year-old? [2:11] Which shows does Dr. Martha consider appropriate for her daughter?  [3:29] A listener asks for help managing her 3 year old's big reactions every time she turns off the screen. [4:19] What is a parent to do about these meltdowns? [7:41] What is actually happening in the child's brain while they are engaged with a screen? [11:22] Is there any evidence that the type of programming can affect children's behavior?  [13:55] Does sticking to a schedule or having some kind of routine around screens help with limit setting? [16:02] Another parent shares a questions about timing exposure to screens. [18:23] Should parents use screen time as a reward? And what about withholding screens as a punishment? [23:55] What are some best practices around modeling moderation for our children? [27:18] Jessica shares takeaways from her conversation with Dr. Martha.   Mentioned in this episode: Brought to you by Lovevery.com   Receive weekly emails about your child's development, and stay in the know about new play essentials, promos, and more by signing up at Lovevery.com Follow Lovevery and Jessica Rolph on Instagram.

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Download our app to get free answers to your parenting questions. Send a quick note in the Ask & Learn tab, and you’ll hear from a Lovevery child development expert within 72 hours. 

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